I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
another holiday season passes without receiving a dick in a box, where did i go wrong in life?
I still have your handprint on my ass. You're not allowed to ignore me yet.
I don't know what he did but now I'm terrified of mustache rides and it's only movember 3rd
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Blow job bear ended up in my bed last night. She didn't live up to her costume.
I made him a flow chart of what to do if I got arrested.
And I kind of want to stare at skinny jonah hill like a weird zoo exhibit lol.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't know he had a girlfriend until after we had sex when he said, "Man I really gotta stop cheating on my girlfriend."
I'm obsessing over hocus pocus right now. What if I change my Grindr profile to "come little children, I'll take thee away to a land of enchantment"
I am making dinner in lingerie and heels and there is a 75% chance his roommate is going to walk in on this.
Yup. There he is. This conversation is awkward.
I want to name my colorful bowl Batman. Why? I still have yet to figure it out. But I'm calling it Batman.
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
HELP! I GOT DRUNK IN THE LIVING ROOM AND CANT GET UP UPSTAIRS
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