Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
remember that time that crown gas station wouldn't sell us a lighter so we had to use matches and birthday candles to smoke with a toilet paper roll? sometimes i miss high school
Thong +tight pants =hungry butt. Not a good look on big women! Walmart sucks.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I want to pinterest what I want to do with my pubes. Why isn't there a board for that?!
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I literally just skipped to the fridge when I realized we had enough vodka left to get day drunk
I have a bandage in my ass crack. In. My. Ass. Crack.
Life's hard when you can't differentiate between retrograde and PMS
Alan said you can come over and eat me out anytime you want, as long as we give him enough notice to hide in the closet before we arrive
I'm covered in bruises and scratches. I dont know whether to call them battlescars or sex decals
Why are there condoms taped to the handle of Tito’s?
I get horny when I drink, pregnant when I fuck and I never lose the booze unlike my purse
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