Yeah next time you are over I'll let you beat it on her pillows and you will feel better.
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All I remember is apologizing to his sister for being a bad influence while I was throwing up into a big gulp cup.
its 4am. im standing over him in my bed eating chinese food, on the phone with dan trying to convince him to break up with his gf. whoredom.
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
Who showers for four hours?!
It was like a tropical nap.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just found out two girls I dated met each other, bonded over how much they hate me, started dating and are gonna get married soon.
I'm the Oprah of jello shots
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
All our friends are getting married, and I'm the dateless guy bringing molly to their weddings.
Just checked out of walmart with a 30 pack of Budlight and a wiffle bat. Hello, Monday night.
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
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