Phease come get me i thought i was in a place i don't even understand
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
The Ukrainian kid just told me that our econ professor wants to bone me. Please tell me that phrase means something different in Eastern Europe.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
be proud. or at least amused. an 18 yr old and a 25 yr old at least makes my average hookup age this week the same as my age.
Prerry sure I narrowly avoided being tazed by a swat cop last night... But on the up side, we found my purse.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
THAT'S NOT NICE
NEITHER WAS PROMISING NOT TO TAKE MY SISTER'S VIRGINITY, THEN PROMPTLY DOING SO
Thanks to you I just drunkenly spot washed a Star Wars hoodie, at midnight on a Friday. If there is a greater level of nerdiness I do not know of its existence
She texted me this morning asking why all of her house pillows were inside her mini-van.
So thats where i built my buckingham palace
It's not even a normal fucking affair I've found myself in. It's a fucking bdsm clusterfuck.
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