ol I'll be okay, it's only a christmas party so the worst that could happen is I end up playing madden naked again
Yes i believe i did use that word. It culminated in a man wearing a corset thigh highs and stripper shoes. All mine btw.
this is the second time this week i got a blowjob from a crying girl.
He stopped replying so I told him I got tested and it came back positive for chlamydia to see if he replied. His phone magically works again!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Nope my penis exudes pure oxygen in times of crisis.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I need my daily rules like rule one don't put your dick in the vacuum cleaner
I just saw a kid on iowa campus story that looked like the guy i made out with on spring break.
So TMI but just realizing I have not masturbated since trump took office. He's sucked the sex drive out of me.
Grandma cant send me 4 lbs of gummi bears and expect me not to soak them in some sort of alcohol
I'm eating dinner with his parents and my phone goes "MOVE BITCH GET OUT THE WAY!" Thanks.
Randomize