you're kinda like the weird girl from The Breakfast Club after the makeover. i mean you're pretty, but you're still weird as fuck
i looked up his schedule, waited outside his classroom, and handed him the receipt for plan b
Bad idea pregaming graduation.... she just threw up before walking across the stage... i'm gonna miss this
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
Somewhere at this very moment, a group of drunk white girls are singing dont stop believing.
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
Am I undercharging for one hour of sex per essay? I need a serious business answer.
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Ive never seen him vulnerable before. He just had surgery and looked so cute on his crutches. like a little baby bird with a broken wing. that i wanted to nurse back to health. with my vagina
I was paranoid that someone would jizz in my hair while I had the cucumbers over my eyes. Super-High Spa Day didnt work out.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
If I got paid for every bad decision I've made I would be one rich bitch by now
Randomize
