I accidentally burped into my bong.
Its like common courtesy of dating, the guy pays for the weed, just like dinner
just saw my sister at the strip club... dont think she's "taking a night class over the summer"
she broke up with me using backstreet boy lyrics
you deserved it if you knew it was backstreet boys.
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She wouldn't stop saying her own name. Like a damn pokemon.
I just want to go some place where I can have a nice night. Grind on men who speak no English, make out with a girl, and not feel judged.
Had to awkwardly dig through all my fake ID's to get my real one so I could vote.......Model citizen over here.
Your friend who drunkenly cleaned the kitchen just wished the class a Happy National Tutu Day. While wearing a tutu. Make a move or I'm gonna marry her.
We were having an argument with his friends mom about whether it was worse that he bootycalled me at 4 a.m. or that I bootycalled him at 12 in the afternoon
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
The funny thing is, we kinda did bring guys home cause you had a fort...
It was somewhere in between an airport security patdown and a medical examination. No groping or squeezing, just brief pokes and pats.
it's like that time i was drunk at relay for life. but with balloon animals...
where are you guys?
stoned at his house watching water boil
So, 'head before the store' turned into a fuck fest, & that's how I ended up at the grocery store smelling like a cum farm on Black Friday. How's your weekend?
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