Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
you puked in the cab and all over yourself and tried to convince the cabby it was there already when he got upset... then you puked again. not too convincing are you
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
I mean, I don't even call it a hangover anymore. It's just morning.
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i'm about to say screw it and get drunk in the hotel by myself
It's 2 pm, at least sit by the pool...
I judge a person on how well they respect their vaginas... I can tell by the lack of respect she has for hers I dislike her.
Okay so for future reference and your own safety I should probably tell you that it is not cranberry juice in that bottle on the kitchen table.
I just got breakfast in bed and he went down on me. And you though he was a bad idea. Shame
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
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Maybe whip a sausage around while you do it and pour some beer on you. Like a German white snake video
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
You know the bunny onesie you sent me? Happy Halloween, I just did the hop of shame.
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
You know you have a good math teacher when we're talkIng about mixture problems and no one gets it until he explains it by talking about mixing alcohol
do you think that identical twins have the same size junk? i just want to know your opinion before i find out.
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