Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
Just threw up on my desk at work. They are making me go home.
She was kind of put off because I kept calling her baby my spirit animal and staring hungrily at her breasts.
I tried giving you a bj last night and all you could manage was "Haha that tickles" and "in the morning"
no you went to jail because you don't know how to whisper when offering a cop a blow job. I'm sure him having a chick partner didn't help.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
i mean, not my actual scene but if someone says "PARTY" ill figure it out
if i can hear my landlord's phone ring you think be can hear my vibrator?
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
Sometimes I think about the fact that I lost my virginity while watching anime and I wonder what that says about me
Post breakup Disney World may be my best idea ever! Tinkerbell just grabbed my dick and gave me a kiss! This really is the happiest place on earth!
Soo are you just gonna poop in my bathtub and not talk to me anymore...?
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Randomize
