Denial is the first step to alcoholism…and I don't hate it
Vegas for my brothers bachelor party. Just landed and I have a boner. I'm giggly and teary eyed I'm so excited.
At barnes & noble, drinking beer out of thermoses, lookin legit.
The only thing that would make my night better is if William Shatner came and read me a bedtime story.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Places you have drunkenly threatened to piss: my bed, my bros bed, my moms bed, my bros wedding
just threw up on dog. broke microwave with cheese and spoon. having a bath with my barbies singing final countdown.
before you ask yes i found the absinthe under your bed. ITS THE FINAL COUNTDOWWWWNNNNNN
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. Zebras have bad attitudes.
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
I have three different pairs of earrings at three different houses including your 16 year old brothers nightstand. Look at my life. Look at my choices
Great, now I'm picturing myself as a fucking garden gnome
Randomize