as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
This sounds like "Sober" Ericka. Sorry that message wasn't for you. I only do business with "Fell off the wagon" Ericka. Please pass that message along to her.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I think there was chlamydia in those woods.
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I'm gonna win the lottery and buy chinchillas and tattoos for everyone
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
Apparently while trying to get up from vomiting in the toilet I grabbed the seat cover for leverage and smashed my own head between it and the bowl. I don't remember this.
Well, I'm at the grocery store wondering whether I exist or not.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
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You know what? I bet HE would do stormtrooper roleplay with me. I'm in.
He leaned over in the middle of the movie and said "My dick's name is Juan". WHO DOES THAT?
I had a great time except for the part where you called another guy, told him you were in a cab - not on a date - and that you'd meet him at a bar in 15 minutes. but besides that it was awesome. Next time capping you at two glasses of wine
Unfortunately, the Bilbo Baggins adventure side of me that likes to go on adventures appears to be losing to the side of me that likes to smoke weed in the bathtub and watch Workaholics.
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
He asked if I had any questions. Apparently, "how thick is the stick up your ass" was not a correct question.