dude, that girl smelled worse than the great depression.
You know how I know he's a virgin? He's wearing transition lenses.
I decided that not getting a job after college is gods way of telling me I will make a great housewife
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i decided to cut a 3rd hole in to my snuggie so i could masturbate all the time.. all time low? or genius?
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
Some random slut told me I was a good dancer then gave me a handjob. I felt like fucking John Travolta.
smelt my brothers hands when he got home to see if he lied about smoking again...he didn't lie but i definitely didn't expect to smell some other girls vagina.
Either I'm deep cleaning my apartment out of severe academic procrastination or I'm subconsciously nesting and need to take a pregnancy test.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Time for jim to play the "dont seriously consider pooping in the trash" game
I'm covered in European cum. How's your day going?
Can't find our DD
He's backstage giving the strippers foot massages.They kidnapped him the moment he walked thru the door.
you don't understand it took me an hour and a half to escape that bed, I had to memorize his sleeping patterns.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
The neighbors ahemed the WHOLE time. Their kids are the ones that scream loud enough for me to remember my birth control. It's payback!
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