That's intense
Raging hang over. 6AM finish. Shat on a bag of trash in an alley. D L that last bit.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
His mom just asked me if I was "fooling around with her baby again" and then when I walked downstairs his dad YELLED "Look who's taking the walk of shame!"
You really need to stop fucking dudes who still live with their parents.
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were talking about masturbation in my pysc class. He says it's healthy. I'm gonna live forever
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
He just said "fuck you" to the bowl he's eating things out of
He's a waiter, looks 15, and told me he loved me after only talking to me for 30 minutes. I told him I wanted a margarita. We got 3 free pitchers. I may have to make this our regular Wednesday night hangout.
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Sorry for peeing on you and your bed last night.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
I wrote notes to myself all over my body. "don't yell at cops again" "Cody stole your phone" "you kissed Cody" "vodka shots are bad for your liver" and "cactus pretty" WTF????
He still want's to kick my ass for fucking his sister, probably a bad idea to leave the bar with his ex...
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