I have this horrible feeling I'm going to blackout tonight & only be able to say 'wasabi bobby' over & over again.
how soon is too soon to introduce handcuffs into a relationship?
Only girl at that party wearing a fake beard and I STILL get laid...
I wish i could sleep and get drunk at the same time...those are my 2 biggest needs right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
I just ate four packages of Swiss Rolls. Being high and on food stamps is AHmazing.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
I'm at the perfect height to walk up to the corner of my mom's stove and rest my balls on it. Just thought you'd like to know they're warm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I totally just somersaulted to the bathroom to avoid moving out of my fetal position
I don't know if I should be concerned or impressed.
Walk of shame dressed as a Christmas tree, it happened. Ho ho ho bitches
He used one of his curtains as a leash and hand restraints. He wins the creative sex challenge hands down.
Oh my fucking god!! There is a barefoot white guy with a fucking ninja sword in the middle of the street next to the pride gas station swinging his sword at peoples cars!! He almost got me. 3 people swerved off the road and stopped. I told a cop.
Just letting you know that your little sister is now your eskimo brother. You can send a thank you edible arrangement to Tammy.
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
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