I just tried to drunkenly fart the beat of Disturbia by Rihanna
Call it a failed empirical study as to whether drugs would make her more interesting. or at least better in bed.
My family is watching Intervention and taking notes. I need to leave NOW!
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
you might as well be a hobo. you were covered in pee last night hanging out on the stairs drunk.
right. well we all have our lows.
Oh we will ALWAYS be together. Or I'll have to delete my Facebook altogether. I've drunkenly boobie trapped photos of us into every album. There's no way I'd ever have the patience to go through that deletion process.
I'm currently looking through google images of circumsized penises and realizing how vital pre-marital sex is.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do what? I was just saying that at some point there's a chance I'll have a boner. Think of it like a guessing game. "Does he have one now?"
Tell her this is the Disneyland of penises.It's a magical place everyone should visit once in their life.
me and him got disney princess makeovers at disneyworld. this is why gay guys make the best friends.
Don't know how your birthday has been, but mine has involved Hershey's syrup and a blowie. It's safe to say you're playing catch up.
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
Me and my boss just exchanged pictures of our bongs and such...I don't know I feel about this
Randomize