This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
finally cleaned my dorm for the first time all year. bleach is awesome.
I'm pretty sure I saw a man standing on a table with no shirt on getting sugar thrown at him while "pour some sugar on me" blaring while the cops were in the house.
I did the seizure Bad Romance dance again last night, didn't I?
you were really good actually. your skill is increasing over time
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
lets just say that i have already today: gotten drunk, got in a fight, got stranded an hour away from home, found a ride, sobered up, and slept. woken back up, and here i am. its been a long day. Day drinking is bad for friendships.
I consider myself an expert at getting drunk and embarrassing people at weddings.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
We need large glitter to throw at people to signify our mystic nature
Fuck their feelings and their drinks they will get hit with sparkly confetti
It's not that he's ugly its just that being blind folded makes everything less awkward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Last thing I remember is whiskey shots. My roommate tells me we were there 15min before I decided to run home naked. And we live across from a police station.
You informed me your place was now a nudist colony and unless I was there to drink schnapps with the cat I had to strip.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
that lady just saw me taking a picture of her baby... It's time to leave.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
So technically I made out with my second cousin this weekend... But it's by marriage and I'm adopted, so it's ok.
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