Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
My cardio has turned into running out of the cold from bar to bar.
Sorry for scaring your son with my drunken animal impressions
The stripper from Delilahs paid the desk clerk to find out my room #. Either Im doin something very right or she's doing it worng.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
honestly i just want a cigarette and someone to go down on me... are you interested in helping with either of those
I know you're my sister, but I'm pretty sure I'm going to have sex with one of your exes this weekend. He's probably not gay, but I'll let you know.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The annual Father's Day Wake and Bake has been canceled due to lack of hustle.
Like I don't care that he's a drug dealer, but I have a problem with his inefficient and ineffective business model.
I worry about your feelings an awful lot for somebody who gets off on making you cry
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
Don’t get me wrong—I love silver and bracelets—but handcuffs are not a good look on me…
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