hook me up with the drugs dog keep up the good work
But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I kept calling his name while we were having sex cuz i was so proud that i remembered it.
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
21 People Confess Their Craziest Online Dating Experience
Just finished my law exam. Questions 4-18 seemed to pertain specifically to things we've done this semester.
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
I need someone to get my backpack from the bar before class tomorrow. I have to give my students their papers back.
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
i feel like i got punched in the cervix. he's a little different in bed than i thought he would be..
These 27 Hilarious People Wrote Their Own Obituaries
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
He's like a computer from 2001 in a 2014 world. It just doesn't work. Lots of glitches.