9 beers later and she still looks like Gary Busey.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I know the vomits not mine cause its on my back.
it will be a sad day when drinking racks of keystone isnt socially acceptable anymore
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What can I say, he stumbled upon the key to my heart: orgasms and mac 'n cheese.
I just called my mom 'Napoleon bronaparte'. I need to stop hanging out with you.
You know you're old when tea and a hot bath are more appealing than beer pong with lesbians.
I barely remember the girls that I got pregnant, you think I'm gunna remember the ones that played handball
dude...i punched my best friend in the face, broke up with my girlfriend, and shit my pants.......now i don't know which one to take care of first.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My trash can accurately represents my weekend: Bojangles wrappers and magnums.
FYI the blow job was for papa johns pizza
I regret 8000% nothing
I'm sorry for drunkenly throwing a spoon at you and then laughing at your pain.
First time a guy goes down on me and his dog had its head on my knee the whole time. I swear it was judging me.
I need an outfit for the bar tmrw that reads I have daddy issues and would like a fancy sugar daddy.
Your participation in the democratic process makes me horny AF
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