I woke up with my face in a pile of pancakes and 3000 mistakes.
found a dugout with weed in it in dad's car. decided to top up the weed compartment with salvia. for fun.
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Apparently my downstairs neighbors don't much appreciate it when I do drunk aerobics at 3am on a Wednesday...
It is becoming increasingly more likely that my entire halloween costume will be entirely composed of borrowed clothing from the two girls I'm hooking up
This holiday season is going to be rough between people coming home for the holidays and the already regulars on my list I might have to clone my vagina to make sure I get everyone for all they are worth
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
It got weird the panthers lost and we started throwing wings at one another
unless you want this visit to have a different tone... more romantic, less molly in a hotel room
I wore grinch underwear to my well woman exam this morning and I feel like I adulted successfully today.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I left the party 20 min ago..just thought i would tell you so you wouldnt think i fell in the lake again
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