First guy to fuck a girl in the new tool shed. Her underwear is on the shovel hook.
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
there is a school bus full of santas parked in front of the liquor store
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I prob couldn't even get his attention if I had a dick growing out of my forehead
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
he's doing fine. just headbutted the wall and threw up
Moment of the day: as we leave the restaurant, she reaches into my pocket, pulls out her panties, and angrily marches to her car. I felt like a sketchy magician.
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
HE WAS SUPPOSED TO BE THE TROPHY HUSBAND! I WAS GOING TO BE THE SUCCESSFUL ONE!
I'm pretty sure even the managers want me to show up hungover my last day, it would be negligent and disrespectful to do otherwise
someone is getting fuckign RAWDOGGED on this campus as we speak and it makes me FURIOUS
Randomize