do you remember wearing her cheetah rainboots and making bacon shirtless?
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
his roommates said i can move in if i promise to only drink tequila the rest of the semester. challenge accepted.
IM PICKING UP BLOW FOR US STOP WHINING ABOUT SEX
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
Don't think anyone else in the building has a lunchbox full of yay
Hey there's a sandwich in there too!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
We're living together and you don't know if I've seen Titanic?!
I think this bruise on my arm is actually an impression of your face
I asked him to change the channel. There was no way I could do reverse cowgirl with golf on.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize