god I hate her. why can't she just fuck and leave like a normal slut.
it felt like I walked into a Tool Academy challenge
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
I need to make a new year's resolution to only pee in toilets. And it needs to start happening before the new year.
I just stood on my roof naked pouring vodka onto my garden. sweet dreams
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
he cock-blocks himself, don't try to make excuses for him!
I'm currently sitting at your kitchen table eating chicken nuggets that I dug out of the trash and thinking about how much I need to get laid.
Everytime I feel sad about the break up; I recall that she is a Bernie supporter and feel all better
I should be in a better mood, I just went home and had a quickie on my lunch break.
I had a sandwich.
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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