I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
They're all gay and their wifi network is named HOMOS. I want to live with these people.
Either allow it in a formal toast or i will drunkenly tell your in-laws while i'm dancing on their table. either way, the truth is coming out
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
I ended up with a bullet proof vest and I still don't know his last name.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Great. Now I'm always going to be the roommate that boned a guy with a third nipple.
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
Ski vacations are for hooking up with randoms. It's like I don't even know you
She yelled "taste the gay rainbow" in a biker bar. She's either brave or fuckin stupid.
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
So nothing to worry about, but i'm probly going to jail soon, just thought i should let you know so you didn't worry. Bye!
Yay I only have ONE giant mystery bruise from yesterday
jump out the window naked night went bad
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