But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
I went with the blow up doll and I'm glad I did.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
I bruised his dick. I bruised his dick WITH MY MOUTH!! I've never felt more accomplished.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Okay. Did anyone see me spend $1600 at the strip club last night? Or is this someone else's receipt in my pocket?
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
I realised my life had gone downhill since being unemployed when I was making key lime pie on acid at 3am Tuesday morning.
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
It's gonna be one of those someone is getting divorced parties
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up with my shoes still on and my pants around my ankles cause I couldn't get them over my shoes
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
The cat likes watching me spank Michael. I don’t know how to feel about this.
Randomize