Does having sex in the men's bathroom on the boardwalk count as having sex on the beach?
if you hear someone banging on your door early in the morning, it's me with some breakfast burritos, so don't be alarmed
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
And then he told me he just wanted me to hold his cock while we watched tv...
He's going to let me keep his bowl in my car. Does that make us Facebook official?
It was like you were trying to communicate only you were using every letter of the alphabet but in no order and in a different language
And by go well you mean everyone's hammered right?
Yupp. And someone's bleeding
I get hit on by the prison guards every time i go to see him. Seriously.
And think got sick again from going outside naked. Word to all females...don't try the naked trench coat thing.
I apologize for being mean. I love the blender and your vagina.
Some girl woke me up at 1:30 am looking for weed and the next thing I know I'm in a hot tub with 3 girls, 2 40's, and a blunt.
Bud... Did you mean to tweet a picture of your dick? If not just letting you know.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
just because i'm not a monk anymore doesn't mean I need to tell you about my new sex life.
which is fantastic by the way.
Randomize
