why was he too nerdy?
he was a tetris block for halloween
On my list on ridiculous morning after bus rides home, still sopping wet and carrying a giant straw hat is definitely top five
frankly if you're gonna get kicked out of your place, hooking up with your gay roommate's boyfriend would be the most entertaining way to do it.
Like that girl needs to get her shit together. For her vagina's sake.
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I refuse to go to this wedding alone, or sober. Practice drunk-walking in heels and a Bridesmaid dress begins tonight.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
i did nothiing wrong other than not tell that kid his whole back was covered in puke
Got laid at work. Yes, AT work, why they let me run this tennis center by myself speaks to their poor judge of character.
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
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Next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
I don't want anything calamari shaped after last night. But I appreciate the Cheerios offer.
FUCK YOU AND YOUR WEAK ASS EYEBROWS
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
I WAS SURROUNDED BY HAIRY BALLS ALL ALONE.