So I'm stoned for 420, and have an eye doctor appointment in fifteen minutes
Are your eyes okay
I mean if I was Asian they would be
Sexting assembly today. Fuck yes
apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i study at coffee shops because all these damn artsy people motivate me to work towards a real job.
they described our state of being as looking similar to a crime scene....you were on the ground and i was running around screaming.
i mean, i stole her boyfriend and beat her snake score on facebook within 48 hours. not her week.
Check Facebook. Random dude tagged us in photos from last night dancing at Denny's while eating a sampler platter. 1. How does he have our names, and 2. You said we ate at Tbell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I haven't had a normal poop since halloween, we are not mixing vodka and tequila ever again
RESPECT THE VODQUILA
There's weed in my toothpaste. Explain.
You've changed since you got that strap on
It's scary that my vibrator is a dangerous weapon. I want a new one.
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
the voting booth dude cock blocked me or she woulda totally blown me in the voting booth.
Randomize