you can still come hang out if you want
I really don't feel like watching you play video games
What would you say if someone told you they liked your lips?
Which ones?
you know your drunk when 7 soccer players cant catch up to a tranny in high heels who just stole your wallet
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
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winter break is going to suck... i have to put away my college personality and transform into who my parents think i am.
In hindsight, trust falling your grandma was a bad idea. Sorry about that.
I woke up alone at my apt. On the floor with the door wide open, but still. Success.
You are so lucky that drugs are going to kill you before I do.
My fingers feel amazing. Their going like 100 MPH!!
HOLY SHIT. SHIT THAT IS HOLY. HOLY OF THE SHIT.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm about 95% it's a collapsed lung. Go big right?
I will be there. invited or not. I go where the pancakes go.
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
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