So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
i wish exes would disappear into a world where we never have to deal with them again, and they can just create drama for each other. Then if they wanted to talk to us, they would have to apply to get a "visa" to come back to our world.
Did you dl zombie porn on my computer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
today is the best snowday of my entire life. also its no shirt day.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
he just made me youtube cheetahs running and he thinks he is in a pool
figured you should hear this from me. Your refrigerator door is way broken. I opened it last night when i was drunk and tried to climb the shelves. i got to the one with the mustard.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
yo btw licking skeptical coke off table right now
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
You told the cop you where the star of the Track team and tried to run away. So yeah, i'm not surprised.
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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