Just saw two guys having a lawn mower race, and their girlfriends cheering them on. Get me out of Tehachapi,
That Joe Wilson reference just earned you a blow job, Mister!
she had a my little ponys comforter. i left when she went to the bathroom
we just ha sex. he lasted two minutes. i told him to leave because i had class
isnt today saturday?
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Just took 11th shot of tequila. I may puke in my bear head.
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
I take your lack of response to mean that your hands are taped to 40 ounces of something.
He's covered in dirt and enchiladas. We're going drinking now.
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
My hand smells like rave and peanut butter.
He was feeling me up but acting like he was asleep. Like WTF does that mean??
In other news I was masturbating last night and came really fucking hard to the thought of yelling at a customer....
Got so drunk I broke my sink in half. Not. Lying.
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
Randomize
