I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
After that we used the in-room hotel coffee pot to warm up some queso. it was brilliant
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
New Years Resolution for 2011 : QUALITY cock. Not quantity.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ryab! Make hr wtop. Mshe make sme speee. I don want to pee. I want sev. He was so igbad. Redpo.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
Oh you know same old same old. just eating pizza after faking extreme night terrors to get a one night stand to leave my apartment
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
I need vodka and champagne for my new favorite drink, vodkapagne. Alternative spellings are "vodkapain" and "vom-machine"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
you told the police officer you wanted to be just like her one day but not a lesbian
How do I carry myself in a way that says "I swallow"?
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
Just saw a government minister puke and rally.
It happend again, swimming on the floor... Vodka is my friend
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