dude do u know what u did last night?
do i wanna know???
you totally walked in on some couple fuckin in their unlocked dorm room asking for directions to ur room...
we have to go try and show our tits so we can get ID-free drinks at applebees
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
i would one night stand the shit outta him
Going to get a "plan B"urrito
And there are taco shells on the ceiling fan
The cop was more concerned with the fact I had cowboy boots on with shorts than the fact we were under age
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
How was the party last night?
There's a mountain bike in the middle of our apartment. No one will claim it.
I'm gonna take my bong and hot box the pirate ship in the daycare playground.
is leaving the club to fk in his friends van subtle?
Update. A gay dude just told me I'm the most beautiful thing with a vagina he as ever seen. How should I feel about this?
Dude. She was wearing nothing but Wonder Woman panties and a flag for a cape and sneaking around leaving PBR's by passed out people for the morning. She called herself the 'Merica Fairy.
Why haven't you proposed already?
As a courtesy going forward if you could not bang in my house that would be nice
Lady at the airport across from me just pulled a cat out of her bag. can't deal with this right now..
Randomize
