I hate ducks.
What?
they're sketch. like squirrels. squirrels are sketch as fuck.
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Dude you can't just initiate a threesome via twitter
Last night I dipped into my beer fund to pay for groceries. SINCE WHEN ARE MY PRIORITIES SO WHACK???
He just referred to his foreskin as a snuggie. Help.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
I feel like if you're funneling natty lights on a Wednesday at 2:30pm at the apartment complex pool during finals week, you probably don't have your priorities straight.
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
I NEED A MOM FRIEND. NOW.
did i get sucker punched in the face last night or was our make-out session just that intense?
i passed out in front of ihop...for the second night in a row. i think i need to reevaluate my life choices
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