we are at a mexican restaurant and the tv is playing mexican porn. dad won't stop watching.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
promise me that when we are 32, we will look nothing like Kim Zolciak. Promise me right this instant.
i took my sailor hat off and used it as a vom bucket
she tried strangling devon with the garden hose. pretty sure they're broken up
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
How do I tell my Dad that in the picture he has of me and my brother as the background of his phone we were both rolling face on ecstasy?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh my Christ. I just came so hard my penis stood back up and took a bow afterwards. I need Thai food.
People...there is no better feeling in the world than finding out via Google that your ex has a warrant out for his arrest. No better feeling.
There are two women in my bed. I'm gonna have a bowl of noodles so I can better understand my success.
I JUST HAD A FLASH MEMORY OF DOING A SHOT OF WHISKEY WITH MY BEER YOU WERE SUPPOSED TO PUNCH ME IN THE FACE TO PREVENT THAT FROM HAPPENING.
watching spice world high feels so wrong yet so right
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
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