hell yes lets make some ravioli
I mean i stumbled out of the club yelling at random people" I"M GOING TO TEACH YOUR KIDS SOMEDAY!!"
And thats what homeschooling is for
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
i stalked him back to the creation of his facebook in november 2008. that bad.
I'm sure that's not what the inventers of the Turkey baster had in mind, but that's what I had in mine.
I just brought the toaster out onto the porch to light a cigarette, don't talk to me about being desperate.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
I was going to make out with him...then he licked syrup off the kitchen floor.
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
She told me to pick her up in the corner of shame and self-disgust.
I feel like I just want to take a shot of jack, have sex, and shoot myself in the face. In that order exactly.
I just wanna get hammered somewhere crazy. Meet some chicks. Bang them and then go scuba diving.
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
I convinced her that there were two p's in Chipotle - the 2nd one was silent.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.