No one goes out in public like that, unless they do anal
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
mom asked me why i'm never sober at family events, i told her i learned it from her.
Im at the zoo right now high out of my mind and feel as if the animals are watching me and Im the one in a cage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ripped lines in the bathroom before my presentation.. Got bonus marks for my enthusiasm.. This is why I love drugs
You have a roommate and cry when you see my dick
I decided not to eat, and then this man was my fairy " don't black out" godmother
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I feel violated by Miley Cirrus's performance in the VMA's.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just wanted to be nice to your dick and you are rhyming at me.
So....I just took a paddle fan on high speed to the side of the head while getting head...still finished the job, good thing I'm drunk and couldn't feel it.
It was a glorious ass. He has amazing hands. I want to fuck him until he can't do math anymore.
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
If I get back to the house before you, I'm setting up the swing. If you get there before me, it's chains and cuffs.
I'm just hoping that with all the times he's puked in my yard a mushroom field might grow.
Randomize