I would make tea from her tampons just to see her tits
the nicest thing hes ever said to me is give me head.......please
We basically counted to 3 and then dumped each other.
I wish Michael J Fox could read me bedtime stories
He could rock you to sleep
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
She sucked my dick when I had a concussion. It was the coolest feeling ever but the doctor said it was a bad idea. He's obviously gay.
She cried. My mom screams. And nut went everywhere. It was all around a bad situation.
my mom took me to a gay bar and went on and on about all her good times at clubs... i now know where i get it
I was really disturbed by what initially appeared to be a dismembered head sitting beside you. Then I realized you were laying on her body.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
I have alcoholic tendencies but you know what? College
I'm not sure... How do you tell someone who was so smashed they couldn't remember shoving their dick into the fireplace that their mother actually witnessed the whole thing?
Do exhausted, barely concealed hand jobs count as joining the mile high club?
My law teacher drew an elephant on the board in class. I was so high that I laughed for 5 minutes straight. Nobody else laughed and everyone stared. 130 people knew I was high.
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