Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
I'll have you know...trying to masturbate while a song about jesus is stuck in your head is next to impossible
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It just hit me that I woke up to you in a bear suit. Explain.
I've hooked up with three guys in my accounting class. I'm beginning to think my teacher failed me so I can start getting laid again.
I know you don't remember, but the teeth marks on my face say it happened.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
But he's not just anonymous male genitalia anymore. I've met him, I've seen his face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
I also got a mission for you and you're gonna love it. Biggest. Hospital. Party. Ever.
The notification you get from snapchat that someone took a screenie is like a formal declaration of blackmail.
Watching Faye Reagan porn all weekend for St Patty's day. Nothing has ever seemed more appropriate.
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
Randomize