he thinks he's going to hurt your feelings
He can't hurt my feelings
I don't have feelings.
this is a mass text: i just made a grilled cheese with an iron and pasta with the coffeemaker in the hotel room. bow before your new god.
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
It took him longer to remove his skinny jeans than it did for him to finish. I didn't even have time to realize it sucked until it was already over.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So he handed us the weed then asked us if we needed any papers. And she goes "i dont know what that means, do we need to sign something?"
Apparently I fed my Plan B to my turtle last night.
Between the plague n the counterfeit drugs we brought back from mexico I'm not thinking too highly of their country right now. Screw mexican homeless men.
Yeah, I probably scared him away when I drunkenly told him we'd have beautiful children
Drank a fosters this weekend and last weekend. Listening to down under 5 times a day. Spent 100 dollars on a sleeveless men at work shirt circa 1983. We don't leave for another 5 weeks. I call it pregaming.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why is your name written on my hand surrounded by hearts and a bartenders phone number?
He shampooed and conditioned his pubes but can't manscape for shit.
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
Just woke up with only a scarf and my uggs on. i hate partying naked in winter.
These guys are just fucking with my heart instead of fucking me. They're fucking up.
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
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