Fucking love it maybe bedazzle some baby seals? Make them cuter? Who would club a bedazzled baby seal? Only a fucking monster.
with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
First, he can't make me cum.. And now, he can't get it up because he LOVES me?!!??! i don't think so.
21 Distraught People Found Out They Had An STD
Can't imagine what could be worse than pet-naming your penis, but I'll let it go.
so she called me drunk and made me stay on the phone with her while she puked.
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
so apparently I plead the 5th to every question they asked me when they put me under the conscious sedation to set my broken wrist
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
21 Ladies Reveal The Sexiest Thing A Man Can Do In A Public Setting
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
Chugging this bottle of Jim at the airport is proving more difficult than I imagined. TSA is not amused.
Fantasizing about the apocalypse is fun and shit until the conditions that could lead to one suddenly seem feasible