Who said anything about talking that was a booty call
Things I've learned: after you move in with a girl it's much less satisfying to wipe your dick on her sheets after sex because now they're your sheets too
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
Contemplating These 27 Questions Will Make Your Brain Explode
Umm. Any where really. Alcohol and boobs. Those are the requirements.
I just realized there's an entire generation of children that will never know Alex Trebek had a mustache... Sad.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
Said he made a playlist for taking a shit. only two songs on it are the Star Wars theme and "America, fuck yeah" set to repeat.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
25 People Confess The Most Shocking Things They’ve Ever Seen In Public
Holy fuck, spaghetti burritos are the best idea I've ever had.
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
I found them in the bathroom trying to wrap an American flag around Steve's dick. I didn't bother to ask questions.