Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
i just woke up to 15 people singing a whole new world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm drinking whiskey outta the bottle trying to earn the trust of some ducks in the yard
Typcal friday morning so far. Puke, shower, commute/puke, coffee, puke, coffee, bagel, good to go. Lunch today?
I'm so glad I got to use the word gutterslut before 11:00a today.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
Well it was tamer than the 4th of july when I blew that guy I met walking home from the fireworks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It looked like his dick was wearing an argyle sweater.
I feel like I'm eight miles away and my brain is just now getting here. You got a lot of fucking catching up to do.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
Our sibling relationship has really blossomed into a wonderful mutual acceptance of sluttyness
A picture of a damn cupcake brought back 3 fuckboys
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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