HOLY SHIT! Did you see the dick on that Great White Shark?!?!?!
I just saw the pics of me from the costume party as Party Boy. I've effectively cock-blocked myself forever.
remember what we learned. dont lure girls w/ food at the bar. u dont want those ones
Just tried to fight the dj at cowboys because he would'nt play freebird. Pick me up now.
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
I said geronimo as I came I'm not sure if he appreciated the doctor who reference or was just confused
Are you drunk? Because I am and if you're not, this may be very awkward in the morning
Thats for me to know and you to find out.
You know, you have a good excuse now if you have a poor performance. Just say "what do you expect? I took a paintball to the DICK!!"
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
At this point, if I'm not getting fucked by a man in ONLY cowboy boots, it's not worth it.
He is really drunk but I just found $20 so it's like I am getting paid to babysit
he taught all the little kids to ski. it was stupid hot. i'm pretty sure my ovaries exploded.
I left at 4:30 in the morning and I told him it was because I had to take my contacts out
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is