Shaq going to Cleveland; Vince Carter to the Magic; Michael Jackson, Farrah Fawcett, and Ed McMahon die.... ARMAGEDDON IS UPON US!!!!!
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
I wanna dance tonight. i just wanna grind my ass in some man's dick.
I've come to realize time passes slowest when I'm sitting in class, waiting for microwavable foods, working out, & giving head.
Some drunk couple just made out on the sidewalk and it reminded me some sweet moments we have shared...
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
Recycling day makes me feel more like an alcoholic than regular days.
You woke up, laughed, proceeded to throw up on me and then passed out again.
I woke up in a bath tub and my face was sore and it wasn't because of you, I was impressed
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I don't wanna shit myself again in 2015
Tis the season to play Pocahontas! (AKA: Eat a bunch of acid and run around the yard barefoot, the first person to see the colors of the wind, wins!)
Well that's disappointing. I guess I'll give a lesson on dick-breaking another time then
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
