one might say we're banned from that church
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
You guys need to stop introducing me as "the girl you shared"
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
your dad just showed up on the golfcart with a keg. i. love. our. neighborhood.
i was about to rearrange the room but realized that this is the only efficient setup where we can have sex while the other one's asleep without them accidentally seeing.
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
I figured that I'd start organizing the places ive given head. I'll add treehouse right after bandroom
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
he brought me knee pads...is that sweet or weird?
you had acid sex with the barista. why is my bucket list your tuesday?
I'm not worried. All I have to do is not be the drunkest painter at 8:00. Golden.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
There's times when I just want to bottle my farts for later they're so insane.
None of these texts make sense. except for "step 2.5 equals velociraptor." that i get.
Randomize
