I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
If you're ever in Seattle we should Fuck. Or get coffee, whatever.
i am pregamming alone in my car. scale of 1-10 how alcoholic is that
im pretty sure thats an 11
I almost puked on my graduation application. perfect.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
College freshman give noticeably better blowjobs by the 5th week of the semester.
Excuse me hold on, hooking up with someone who is verified on twitter is like being important.
how exactly do you say, "i only agreed to meet you for breakfast because i thought we could go to your place and fuck afterwards."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
if i dont text back till morning its cause i turned my phone off and changed my password to something i wont remember to stop myself from drunk texting...RESPONSIBILITY
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
It's his. I know, I'm pregnant with a genetic douche bag but at least he'll be pretty!
You know when you're a kid and you play at the pool until you passed out? It was like that except instead of playing it was sex.
Randomize