I will come over but only if I don't have to take my sunglasses off for it
there was a guy here who managed to get his head stuck in a fishbowl. no, I don't fuckin know how
You asked him to stand still, you put your leg on his shoulder, started dry humping the air
He threw a goldfish cracker into my toilet and then proceeded to laugh for 32 minutes. I timed it.
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I remember sucking his bleeding finger and then it's all black until he had his hand down my pants.
did anyone else see me puking into my coat sleeve?
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
An old lady WILL get vomited on today.
I made out with an Italian cab driver. Not cool. Help. Good news he will drive us anywhere we want to go as long as you cook food?!?!?! I want to melt into the pavement.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It feels like I was drinking gasoline last night.
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
You cannot tell me you don't have a problem while crying pantsless on a stranger's sofa bed.
I pelvic thrusted so hard while he was eating me out that his nose started bleeding. I think it's broken. Trophy scars, right?
I only have sex with you to have a memory to masturbate to.
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
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