ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
bailing my boss out of jail is a great way to spend memorial day
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
She was the shot vending machine at the party. But free.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
Get up, biotch, before I come traipsing in there to rip apart whatever god-forsaken spoon you have going on between the two of you and your dog.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Was your wine and cheese snap taken from the toilet?
Currently rolling a blunt in the bathroom of Planned Parenthood
If you can give me an orgasm, you'll get a trophy.
Did you really have to freak out and get up half way through to put the cat in the closet?
...
Don’t listen to me, I’m walking around wearing nothing but rave bracelets and headphones shouting “yeeeeaaahhhhhh”
I expected my Sunday morning walk of shame dressed as a sexy Dorothy would get some scorn, but nobody seems to even care
That’s because it’s 2020. The slutty costume walk of shame is a refreshing reminder of a time when wearing masks and catching communicable diseases was a right of passage, not everyday for the foreseeable future.
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