is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
My husband just tried to seduce me by saying we can do it doggystyle so you can watch tv
Dude if you're in another zip code it doesn't count
You don't understand. I'm not like you.
You were scared that your teeth were shrinking so you stuck your fist in your mouth. then you were convinced your hand was growing cuz it got stuck so yu started crying
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He saw my tits then looked up and yelled thank you jesus as loud as he could
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
why does the wii remote smell like your vag?
The bartender gave me a roll of masking tape so I could tape my heels to my feet so I wouldn't lose them when i went drunk running later that night
What's the protocol when you drive the girl's head into the wall during sex and she starts to cry?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like I'm on let's make a deal. should I go with what's behind bulge number 1 or bulge number 2?
I should start printing out disclaimer handouts and passing them out to people saying, "I can not be held responsible for anything I say or do this evening."
I wish there were birth control emojis
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
My dad just said "fuck circus"
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